Delights • Devotion 6

Pastor Ryan and Cathy Story

If you were to pull out (or pull up if it is on your phone) your weekly or monthly schedule, how often is time specifically set aside to spend with your spouse? So often our days and schedules get filled quickly with work, sports, exercise, driving, and a whole list of additional tasks, but one area that often gets neglected is our marriages. While we may delight in our spouse, it may feel challenging to actually set aside time to show that. Time with our spouse often becomes the leftover portions of our week or those few minutes between when the last kid finally goes to sleep and you have not quite closed your eyes to sleep yet. While it is important to express and say our delight, it is just as important to show that we delight in our spouse as well, and one of the greatest ways to do this is with time!

With any relationship, we know that putting in quality time is key. It is hard to imagine any friendship, relationship, or marriage that is able to grow, let alone thrive, without the effort of putting time in. The word effort is used purposefully there, we have to make an actual effort to set time aside to spend with those we care about. Throughout the Song of Solomon, as we read their expressions of love for one another, we can see the importance of the time they are actually together. In Song of Solomon 5:4-6, “My beloved put his hand to the latch; and my heart was thrilled within me. I arose to open to my beloved; and my hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with liquid myrrh, on the handles of the bold. I opened to my beloved, but my beloved had turned and gone. My soul failed me when he spoke.” We can hear in the bride’s words how thrilled she was at her beloved returning home, and upon not finding him at the door any longer her soul fails within her. The strength of the words thrilled and failed is so noteworthy. Not only is she happy, glad, or relieved that he is home, she is thrilled. I view that word as one with excitement and joy, something you have waited for and are so glad to receive. Then the opposite of this, when he is gone, her soul fails within her. She is not just disappointed or sad, but she is deeply saddened at the fact that he is no longer there. Would you consider similar emotions at the prospect of your spouse coming and going?

While his words certainly stuck with her, and while I would guess she knows how much she is loved by her beloved, it was the prospect of him physically being there with her that brought her heart so much gladness. There are many things in life that want to get in the way of us being able to spend time with our spouse, in the same way, these things want to get in the way of us spending time with God. Making and proposing that time to be alone and be together is pivotal for any relationship.

Look for days and ways to make time to spend together. Put a day on the schedule. Maybe finances make it difficult to afford a sitter, consider looking for other families you could swap watching kids with. Maybe you are not comfortable leaving your kids and need to plan a late evening date at home by doing something to make the evening special. You and your spouse may consider going for a walk through your neighborhood or the local park if you are not wanting to spend a lot. Get creative with a way to purpose time with just your spouse doing something out of the ordinary! Make that time a priority to remind your spouse just how much you delight in their company, the same way the bride and bridegroom delighted in being with one another.
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