God’s Design in Marriage • Devotion 5

Lost Interest
Pastor Ryan and Cathy Story

Can you think of a time you lost interest in something you really wanted? As a child, maybe there was a toy or game you just had to have. How many days did it take for that interest to fade away after you got that item? Maybe you think about the job you were so certain was going to be so much better or just perfect, but a few months in you realize you do not like it as much as you thought you would. Just the other day, I was thinking about how in my late teens I decided to get into juicing. I read about the health benefits of juicing fruits and vegetables, I got books with recipes, and finally, I purchased a juicer. I brought it home and remember walking into the kitchen and telling my dad that I was going to start juicing things. His response to me was, “Is this a lifestyle change, or just something you are going to be into for a little bit.” Well, more than twelve years later I can tell you that was just something I was into for a little bit. I could not tell you the last time I used that juicer, or honestly, if I still have it!

Paul David Tripp writes in his book, “Marriage: 6 Gospel Commitments Every Couple Needs to Make,” the idea that when we get married, the person who was once our greatest escape from reality becomes our greatest responsibility. That concept really struck me. When we first met we were so willing to go out of our way to spend time with, miss out on sleep, or spend money just to be with our significant other. However, then we get married, so often those same mentalities no longer seem to apply. The excitement of getting to see our spouse at the end of a long day just does not seem to be the same. The time and effort we were so willing to invest slowly seem to fade.

Song of Solomon portrays a couple whose passion and excitement for one another have certainly not been lost! Song of Solomon 2:16 says, “My beloved is mine and I am his.” Their words throughout the book continue to express complete love and adoration for one another. There is no sense of lost interest between them! Song of Solomon 3:4 adds, “Scarcely had I passed them when I found him whom my soul loves. I held him, and would not let him go.”

There may be many reasons we may start to feel as if the same love, interest, or spark is not in our marriages years after we have wed. The reality is that love grows, changes, and should deepen. Look for ways to show or tell your spouse that your interest is greater now than it was when you first met. If you are feeling like that same passion is not there, consider ways to reignite that spark. Try taking some time and writing out for your spouse (or telling them if writing is not your thing) how much they mean to you. Be descriptive, and have fun!
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