Reach • Devotion 2

Testimony  | Haleigh Washburn

I grew up in a Christian home with two parents who loved and supported me. I started going to church immediately after I was born and was raised going to church multiple days a week. Because of this, I accepted Christ at a very young age. However, I did not know what it meant to be a Christian until I was in seventh grade. I remember being at a youth group retreat and realizing that a relationship with Christ is not just a one-way street, I have to put work into it. Once I realized this my relationship began to grow.        

Even though I grew up in a Christian home and learned to rely on God, I have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. I remember being a little girl looking up at the white fluffy clouds and worrying that a storm was going to come and take my family away. This was even when it was a sunny day with a zero percent chance of rain. This anxiety continued to affect my life throughout high school and manifested in physical ways which caused me to miss a lot of school. I often felt too sick to get out of bed. After many doctors’ visits, I eventually went to see a counselor and was told that most of what I had been experiencing was caused by anxiety. Throughout the whole process of trying to figure out what was wrong, I began to doubt God and His work in my life. I was frustrated with what I was experiencing and mad that He was not taking it away. Eventually, that diagnosis of anxiety led me to seek guidance through some strong Christian women in my life and they helped point me back towards Christ and to see that He was still working in my life.
 
After getting my anxiety under control, or so I thought, I went away to college and began to experience some of the worst anxiety that I have ever felt. This eventually led to a time of depression. Again, I began to doubt God and His work in my life. After reaching a dark place, I had a moment of realization that I did not want to let my anxiety and depression run my life and I sought out Christian counsel yet again. God’s faithfulness through my whole journey with depression and anxiety is evident through my story. There were many times where I was frustrated, and almost wanted to walk away, but God was always there pulling me back.

A passage that I stumbled across after one of my worst periods, and quickly became one of my favorites, is 1 Corinthians 15:50-56. In the passage, Paul is writing about the future coming of Christ and how we will all be resurrected. He writes in verses 51-52, “We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet.” That is how quickly all of the pain and brokenness in this world will be gone. I cling to the promise that all pain and death will be gone in an instant and we will go to be with Christ.