The Family Challenge
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Lesson Four: Defending the Family
Carole Combs: Women's Ministry

“Defense! Defense!” the crowd shouted as the opposing team drove the ball towards the basket for the home team. If the home team wins this game, they will become the National Champions. I sat watching this very situation developing before my eyes. Unfortunately, I watched people battle over a game that is supposed to be a sport to enjoy that does not have any eternal significance. I have also sat and watched husbands, wives, and children not battle to defend the family, which does have eternal significance.
Is there something in your life that you have defended above your family?

Before the family can be defended, you must first believe that God created humans, male and female, in His image. So God created man in His own image, in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them (Genesis 1:27).   Anything outside of this violates God's design. When our culture fails to respect and promote God's intended family, the union between a man and a woman, the culture is on a downward spiral to a society that defends nothing!
What is your stand against attempts to redefine marriage, which is making marriage into something that God never intended it to be?

But no one can enter a strong man's house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man. Then indeed he may plunder his house (Mark 3:27).
What do you think this verse means?

What does this have to do with defending the family?

Have you allowed plundering in your home?

It is virtually impossible to defend someone or something if you don't know or believe in that person or idea. The Word of God provides guidelines for good relationships in the family.

"If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything."

What does the family mean to you?

Is it important?  Is it evident that it is important to you?

Is it important enough to defend?

Nehemiah had returned to Jerusalem to plan, work, and oversee the reconstruction of the walls and gates of his home. He and the people faced an enemy that wanted to thwart their efforts.  ...I stationed the people by their clans, with their swords, their spears, and their bows. And I looked and arose and said to the nobles and to the officials and to the rest of the people, "Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes” (Nehemiah 4:13,14).

Where have you allowed the enemy into your home?

Why is it important to know that God is great and awesome?

It is challenging to defend our family as the waves of this culture are constantly bashing against the ship of our homes. You may find yourself running around just fixing the leaks - those toxic leaks of our culture that seep into our homes. They seep through 15-second commercials on television and cute characters on the kids’ gaming system. The toxins can even seep through your social media accounts. These things are great for entertainment and for connecting with family and friends, but don't allow them to poison or kill the relationships within your home. Defend your family. Keep the family the top priority.

What are you too busy doing that defending your family is not a top priority?

What is in your home that distracts you from your family?

Defending versus Dysfunctional

  • 220,000 fewer people are getting married now than a decade ago, even though the population has increased
  • 20 million children live in single-parent homes
  • Over 43% of children are born into unmarried households


A dysfunctional family is where everyone in the household is negatively affected by a problem, even if only one family member is experiencing the problem. Dysfunction in the family, you may be experiencing it now or have as a child, may not have been caused by your choices or under your control.

How will you choose to go forward to defend your family?

Do you have to repeat the patterns of your past?

Defense is a choice. If my son's basketball team had not defended their basket, they would not have become the NCCAA National Champions. If we choose not to defend our families, we will all suffer the consequences of a loss that I believe none of us can ever imagine or expect. “Defense! Defense!”

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